One Year At My New Job and Next Month I will be 50!
So, as the title reads, this past Tuesday was a my first full year here at my new job and I can say I am still loving it. There has been some ups and downs along the way...we have lost 2 more people in my department, but all in all it is still a place I want to get up in the morning and go to.
So, 50 is on the horizon next month. Can I believe it, well yes and no. When I say the number, I can't believe. When I look in the mirror, I can't believe. How I feel, at times, yes I can believe...the aches and pains of getting old are definitely there and when I hear of someone who has passed away that I remember growing up with then yes, it definitely hits home that I have reach the halfway point in my life. I remember when I was in 30's and my sister was in her 50's and she would say things to me, like just wait till you are my age and how you will view things and what you will start to worry about in life more. I really didn't know what she meant, but I do now. The way I handle and think about things are so different now than when I was in my 20's/30's for sure.
Even with approaching 50 next month, I don't feel depressed about it and I don't think I will have the dread on that day that I hear people talk about. One of the reason I think that I won't, is that I don't (for most part) feel 50. I feel better now than I did in my 30's...I look in the mirror now and see beauty. I very rarely find a physical flaw that I focus on. I truly credit this to my current lifestyle for the last 4 years (low carb). It has given me so much confidence in my appearance which in turn makes me more outgoing, lighthearted and a fun person to be with. So, bring it on 50, I am waiting for ya!
E and I have been living through a major kitchen renovation for the past 3 months and we are in the home stretch with the flooring and backsplash to be installed next week. It has come out so well and it is truly our dream kitchen...so happy with our decision to move forward with this.
Otherwise, marriage and life has turned out pretty good, despite our childless status. I never thought when I was going through the heartbreak of the losses that I could even envision a childless life in the future, but I can say that things to get better the further you get from that place. The moments do come still, but they are much farther apart and with my age now I can more easily accept the fact that we will never have a human child, but at least we can have as many furbabies during this lifetime that we want and that makes me very happy.
Even if no one visits this site anymore, this is a place for me to come and let out my thoughts and feelings. There have been times in the past I have thought of shutting this down, but then I think otherwise and realize that it is important, at least to me, to be able to have this blog to come to, even if it is far and few between these days.
So, 50 is on the horizon next month. Can I believe it, well yes and no. When I say the number, I can't believe. When I look in the mirror, I can't believe. How I feel, at times, yes I can believe...the aches and pains of getting old are definitely there and when I hear of someone who has passed away that I remember growing up with then yes, it definitely hits home that I have reach the halfway point in my life. I remember when I was in 30's and my sister was in her 50's and she would say things to me, like just wait till you are my age and how you will view things and what you will start to worry about in life more. I really didn't know what she meant, but I do now. The way I handle and think about things are so different now than when I was in my 20's/30's for sure.
Even with approaching 50 next month, I don't feel depressed about it and I don't think I will have the dread on that day that I hear people talk about. One of the reason I think that I won't, is that I don't (for most part) feel 50. I feel better now than I did in my 30's...I look in the mirror now and see beauty. I very rarely find a physical flaw that I focus on. I truly credit this to my current lifestyle for the last 4 years (low carb). It has given me so much confidence in my appearance which in turn makes me more outgoing, lighthearted and a fun person to be with. So, bring it on 50, I am waiting for ya!
E and I have been living through a major kitchen renovation for the past 3 months and we are in the home stretch with the flooring and backsplash to be installed next week. It has come out so well and it is truly our dream kitchen...so happy with our decision to move forward with this.
Otherwise, marriage and life has turned out pretty good, despite our childless status. I never thought when I was going through the heartbreak of the losses that I could even envision a childless life in the future, but I can say that things to get better the further you get from that place. The moments do come still, but they are much farther apart and with my age now I can more easily accept the fact that we will never have a human child, but at least we can have as many furbabies during this lifetime that we want and that makes me very happy.
Even if no one visits this site anymore, this is a place for me to come and let out my thoughts and feelings. There have been times in the past I have thought of shutting this down, but then I think otherwise and realize that it is important, at least to me, to be able to have this blog to come to, even if it is far and few between these days.
Happy (almost) birthday. I'm still here. :-)
ReplyDeleteHappy that your kitchen is your dream kitchen and that life is good.
I agree; it's not the life I pictured, but it's a lovely life, nonetheless...a lovely life, indeed. ;-)