Count down till Friday....
Had another one of those headaches last night. It is weird because it usually starts close to 5 p.m.,when I am leaving work and I have it for most of the evening till I go to bed. I read on the internet that it might have to do with not eating enough or hormones. I probably am not eating like I would usually eat because I just don't have the appetite and I seem to get full faster these days. So, I am thinking it might be both. I went down to the cafe to grab lunch today and got 2 small fish (tilapia) tacos and I actually ate both where normally I would eat one and save the other one for tomorrow. I also had a glass of O.J. and some crackers this morning while getting ready for work. So, I am hoping that by doing this, the headache won't come back later on today. I am experiencing more twinges on my right back area today and it seems to be only be on that side....hummmm.
So, back to the reason for the title of this post...Friday is my 2nd u/s and I am both excited and nervous all at the same time. I just am hoping beyond hope that everything looks fine. I have had no more lite brown spotting, which I am thrilled. I am hoping that I will be able to see more than a sac and that there will be an embryo...that is what I am fearing the most right now, it not being there...don't ask me why, maybe I am reading too much stuff about the "what if's" and worrying.
Keeping my fingers crossed and doing alot of praying that it all goes well. I would really love to start thinking positively about the future of this baby, but it is so hard when there is such the unknown. Some days I wish I could go back to when I was pregnant the first time and how I just thought we will just have a baby, very carefree thinking/no worries and didn't think at all about miscarrying...boy, those were the days. I remember going out at week 4 and purchasing a babybook and started writing in it, also purchased a cross-stitch baby sampler and started working on it. My mom sent us a burp cloth with a matching bib and a small Anna Green Gables book on Moms and Babies (all of this stuff I still have, by the way). I remember even going to the Babies R Us store with E and looking at clothes and crib bedding and picking out what I was wanting already...this was all before 7 weeks. Now, it is so different, I haven't even been in a Babies R Us since then nor do I plan on going to one for awhile longer. When I do go into a store, I don't even go anywhere near the baby section. I think I looked once on the internet at crib bedding and then immediately shutdown the site after 10 minutes of looking. I am so afraid of hoping/wanting/dreaming/wishing and purchasing anything, for fear that it will all be for not. It makes me so sad in a way, but I don't know how else to deal with this, but go back to my motto "day by day".
So, back to the reason for the title of this post...Friday is my 2nd u/s and I am both excited and nervous all at the same time. I just am hoping beyond hope that everything looks fine. I have had no more lite brown spotting, which I am thrilled. I am hoping that I will be able to see more than a sac and that there will be an embryo...that is what I am fearing the most right now, it not being there...don't ask me why, maybe I am reading too much stuff about the "what if's" and worrying.
Keeping my fingers crossed and doing alot of praying that it all goes well. I would really love to start thinking positively about the future of this baby, but it is so hard when there is such the unknown. Some days I wish I could go back to when I was pregnant the first time and how I just thought we will just have a baby, very carefree thinking/no worries and didn't think at all about miscarrying...boy, those were the days. I remember going out at week 4 and purchasing a babybook and started writing in it, also purchased a cross-stitch baby sampler and started working on it. My mom sent us a burp cloth with a matching bib and a small Anna Green Gables book on Moms and Babies (all of this stuff I still have, by the way). I remember even going to the Babies R Us store with E and looking at clothes and crib bedding and picking out what I was wanting already...this was all before 7 weeks. Now, it is so different, I haven't even been in a Babies R Us since then nor do I plan on going to one for awhile longer. When I do go into a store, I don't even go anywhere near the baby section. I think I looked once on the internet at crib bedding and then immediately shutdown the site after 10 minutes of looking. I am so afraid of hoping/wanting/dreaming/wishing and purchasing anything, for fear that it will all be for not. It makes me so sad in a way, but I don't know how else to deal with this, but go back to my motto "day by day".
Will be thinking of you as you prep for your next u/s! the wait is so killer so hopefully there is some good mindless tv on that you can absorb yourself into to pass time :) I asked my u/s technician if we could have a photo (I literally had my camera in my purse so DH would be ready to whip it out) but instead she said, sure of course! and printed the 'best' ones out for us - good luck!!!
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