Follow-Up Visit at Dr. Office Today....

Just got back from seeing my wonderful doc about the results of the lab and getting on a birth control pill.  As always, she enters the room with arms opened wide and gives me a big hug and immediately asks how I am doing.  I tell her physically I am fine, mentally and emotionally...trying to deal.  She was told by her lovely assistant (I truly mean the "lovely" in such a good way) that E got laid off 2 weeks ago.  So, I didn't have to go and explain how emotionally draining this past month has been.  She reconfirmed the results from the lab as unconclusive - couldn't test due to not enough tissue.  She wants my HCG levels to go down to 0, so I will be going for more bloodwork (again...UGH).  She also wants me to come back in 6 weeks and if the HCG levels still haven't gone down to 0, bloodwork again..UGH.  I never had this much bloodwork done with the first miscarriage...hummm? Once the HCG levels are down, then she wants to see about the polyp (make sure they aren't more) and also send me for a mammogram.  She totally got where I am at this stage and handed me a prescription for Micronor and said I could start immediately.  I told her how much I appreciate her kindness and what a pleasure it is to be coming to a OB/GYN office environment such as this.  I have only had one other practice even close to this one.  It is a very rare find these days.

I was so truly happy to open the door to the waiting room and see not a single pregnant woman in there and the same when I left.  It was like God heard my wish today to not make this anymore difficult than what I have already experienced.  It isn't that I get all upset when I see pregnant women anywhere else...there is something about it happening there, that conjures up such emotion.  I guess because that office is where I was told "Congrats you are pregnant" and the same place I was told "Sorry, but you are miscarrying" To have to sit in the same room with other woman sitting there with a nice pregnant belly and a glow...is like a blow to your stomach.  I wish them no ill will, but at the same time, I just want to say "do you know how lucky you truly are"?